On a daily basis, I speak on the phone with clients of different ages, different levels of experience, and from different industries. In a nice little bit of juxtaposition, there are times when I hang up with a first-year marketing manager, pick the phone back up and immediately begin a conversation with a seasoned CEO. Regardless. I learn a lot in these conversations and, once in a while, I get to teach clients a thing or two about how to effectively use social media.

However, I’d like to take this opportunity to highlight some odd things that I’ve picked up on from clients that I didn’t ever know before: corporate lingo. I don’t know what it is about the corporate world, but some of the phrases and analogies that we use are some serious head scratchers.

Now, I write this fully aware that there is zero chance anyone is going to stop using these phrases. In fact, try as I might, I myself am sure to drop some of these on the phone this afternoon. But, at the very least, I say we make a conscious effort to at least try to stop using the following:

“Run it up the flagpole”: Maybe I’m just too literal of a guy, but I always think of someone literally running my idea up a flagpole. I don’t feel like euphemisms are necessary for things that can easily be explained, like “I need to check with my bosses”.

“Out of pocket”: Typically, this is used when an employee fronts the cost of a work-related expense. But lately, (important) people started using “out of pocket” to describe being out of the office or unreachable. This usage is completely lost on me, but I’ll take it any day over “OOTO” (“out of the office”), which, to me, just looks like binary.

“Tickler file”: There are often misconceptions about people who work in sales. In my mind, I always do my best to distinguish myself this stereotypical “Sales Guy”. “Sales Guy” uses a script, dresses like Michael Scott, and always wants to “chit chat”. “Sales Guy” has a tickler file. I have a CRM system that I put reminders in.

“Touch base”: This, to me, is the epitome of weird corporate lingo. This is a phrase that has no use outside of the context of work (try using it in an email chain with your friends and see what happens). More importantly, it just doesn’t make sense. “Touch base” is so widely used that people don’t even think twice. Why not just say “reconnect” or “follow up”? Besides, you definitely don’t want to end up like a colleague of mine who, on a phone call, accidentally reversed these two words mid-sentence, as in “I just wanted to base touch you.” #fail

“Circle back”: See above. Whenever I hear this, I feel a sudden urge to send someone a facsimile.

This is by no means an exhaustive list. I could go on and on, but I want to hear from you! If you are interacting with clients, are on the receiving end of a sales pitch, or just talking to people in general, what are some corporate phrases that you love to hate?